Hans van der Griff
Punk-ass singer-songwriter-guitarist Dylan Nirvana is the lezbo-nun messiah in the gee-mom-am-I-trying-too-hard, angst-a-thon church of alternative music. His sand-blasted apocalyptic vocals are pith-viper attacked by suicidal guitar in songs that don't suck, have lyrics that are cool, and hook without hate.
Originally playing the ding-repair clinics in surfer Florida's St. Augustine, now his shows in Manhattan, according to one rabid concert-goer, "have always started calm, gotten a little faster, slowed down again, and then really got faster again."
While it is true that Mr. Nirvana's performances are well attended by New York's intellectual elite, they have become overrun by tit-goths, and over-sexed feel-good coffee bar dropouts. "ve vere trying to keep our seats und mind our own businesses, ven all dese misclad teenagers in bondage pants started de pushing und de shoving und de pushing und de shoving," says one Hans van der Griff, professor of neuro-astrophysics at Yale University. "all my colleagues und I drove in de Volvo in de cramped conditions, just to be mistreated by these feral dogs of de underbelly of our culture."
Originally playing the ding-repair clinics in surfer Florida's St. Augustine, now his shows in Manhattan, according to one rabid concert-goer, "have always started calm, gotten a little faster, slowed down again, and then really got faster again."
While it is true that Mr. Nirvana's performances are well attended by New York's intellectual elite, they have become overrun by tit-goths, and over-sexed feel-good coffee bar dropouts. "ve vere trying to keep our seats und mind our own businesses, ven all dese misclad teenagers in bondage pants started de pushing und de shoving und de pushing und de shoving," says one Hans van der Griff, professor of neuro-astrophysics at Yale University. "all my colleagues und I drove in de Volvo in de cramped conditions, just to be mistreated by these feral dogs of de underbelly of our culture."